I Prayed, Eventually

I Prayed, Eventually

6:10

“If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them,” James 4:17, NIV.

There are times when I want to choose ignorance over knowledge. Last week I challenged us all to ask God to search us. I don’t know about you, but He searched me and found me wanting.

I had slipped back into an epicurean lifestyle. Not a degenerate lifestyle like that of the Corinthian church, but a self-centered “me” lifestyle of my wants and desires over God’s.

I have GERD and am supposed to be on a “special diet.” And it takes its toll at times. So, in my mindset of ”me first,” I ate whatever I wanted. But the consequences of such actions were actually more widespread. I got sick and therefore was of no use to my family or ministry opportunities.

I also get lazy, due to inactivity and play games on my phone, a lot of games. Spending my time in what I deem fun. Sudoku, Wordle and solitaire might not be games on the elders’ list of “don’t play,” but do I really need to fill three to four hours playing these and other games? It’s such a waste of time. Fun as it was, because I had a high score—once.

But God woke me up from that stupor, and snapped me back into His reality.

Realizing that I had walked away from God’s good things to pursue my own was definitely cause for repentance. Choosing my way over God’s way, should always end in remorse.

I was reminded to turn my joy into mourning. James 4:9.

I needed to spend some time to contemplate what it meant to be a child of God. And to walk in full obedience. God is not like a jailer, sentencing me to life in jail for a parking ticket. He was showing me that my roots were getting infected. It’s the root of the action that God was trying to remove—my selfish way, over His good and right way. It really didn’t matter the game I was playing, it was my attitude behind it that God was calling out.

Before you say, “But it was only a game, you’re being too hard on yourself.” You need to remember, for me I had stepped out of my lane, and God showed me it was wrong.

“He who knows the right thing to do and doesn’t do it, is sin.” James 4:17.

The reward of confession was relief, peace and the returned joy.

God is for us; He is not against us. He wanted me to be reminded that His path brings life, and my path, my ways, my pleasures or desires bring death, Proverbs 18:21.

God knows I desire life, so He pointed out that which would not accomplish my true desire and goal, doing life His way to gain a good life.

He is a good Father after all. It’s part of His job to keep us on His path. We have a responsibility, as well. To listen and follow Him.

How are you doing? Are you asking God to search you? It’s worth the initial embarrassment to get a clean heart and soul.

Father,

Thank You for always being there for me. You are a good and faithful Father. I have learned over the years that I can trust You around every corner I walk, even in the dark.

You have shown me over these last 50 years that You are for me not against me, thank You. That You truly know what’s best for me.

Thank You, for Your constant care and tender hand of correction. For how can I have Your perspective, if my eyes are focused on my own. Help me to see You first.

Help those who shy away from Your help to learn to trust Your love, power and grace. Help them to open the door to Your gentle asking and leading.

“Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me,”

‭‭Revelation‬ ‭3‬:‭20‬, ‭NIV‬‬.

Father, I love You.

Amen.